"Kids Takes On Life"
SOME SUREFIRE WAYS TO MAKE A PERSON FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU "Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores." - Del, age 6
"Shake your hips and hope for the best." - Camille, age 9
"Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs ... and don't worry if their parents are right there." - Manuel, age 8
"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love." - Alonzo, age 9
"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me." - Bart, age 9
HOW CAN YOU TELL IF TWO ADULTS EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE? "Just see if the man picks up the check. That's how you can tell if he's in love." - Bobby, age 9
"Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold ... Other people care more about the food." - Bart, age 9
"Romantic adults usually are all dressed up, so if they are just wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up." - Sarah, age 9
"See if the man has lipstick on his face." - Sandra, age 7
"It's love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are --- on fire." - Christine, age 9
TITLES OF THE LOVE BALLADS YOU CAN SING TO YOUR BELOVED "'How Do I Love Thee When You're Always Picking Your Nose?'" - Arnold, age 10
"'You Are My Darling Even Though You Also Know My Sister.'" - Larry, age 8
"'I Love Hamburgers, I Like You!'" - Eddie, age 6
"'I Am in Love with You Most of the Time, but Don't Bother Me When I'm with My Friends.'" - Bob, age 9
"'Hey, Baby, I Don't like Girls but I'm Willing to Forget You Are One!'" - Will, age 7
"'Honey, I Got Your Curly Hair and Your Nintendo on My Mind.'" - Sharon, age 9
WHAT MOST PEOPLE ARE THINKING WHEN THEY SAY "I LOVE YOU" "The person is thinking: Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he showers at least once a day." - Michelle, age 9
"Some lovers might be real nervous, so they are glad that they finally got it out and said it and now they can go eat." - Dick, age 7
HOW WAS KISSING INVENTED? "I know one reason that kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and they didn't always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses." - Gina, age 8
HOW A PERSON LEARNS TO KISS "You can have a big rehearsal with your Barbie and Ken dolls." - Julia, age 7
"You learn it right on the spot when the gooshy feelings get the best of you." - Brian, age 7
"It might help to watch soap operas all day." - Carin, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE? "When they're rich." - Pam, age 7
"It's never okay to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you ... That's why I stopped doing it." - Tammy, age 10
"If it's your mother, you can kiss her any time. But if it's a new person, you have to ask permission." - Roger, age 6
"I look at kissing like this: Kissing is fine if you like it, but it's a free country and nobody should be forced to do it." - Bart, age 9
HOW TO MAKE LOVE ENDURE "Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work." - Dick, age 7
"Don't forget your wife's name ... That will mess up the love." - Erin, age 8
"Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash." - Dave, age 8
"Don't say you love somebody and then change your mind ... Love isn't like picking what movie you want to watch." - Natalie, age 9
"Shake your hips and hope for the best." - Camille, age 9
"Yell out that you love them at the top of your lungs ... and don't worry if their parents are right there." - Manuel, age 8
"Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love." - Alonzo, age 9
"One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat. French fries usually works for me." - Bart, age 9
HOW CAN YOU TELL IF TWO ADULTS EATING DINNER AT A RESTAURANT ARE IN LOVE? "Just see if the man picks up the check. That's how you can tell if he's in love." - Bobby, age 9
"Lovers will just be staring at each other and their food will get cold ... Other people care more about the food." - Bart, age 9
"Romantic adults usually are all dressed up, so if they are just wearing jeans it might mean they used to go out or they just broke up." - Sarah, age 9
"See if the man has lipstick on his face." - Sandra, age 7
"It's love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are --- on fire." - Christine, age 9
TITLES OF THE LOVE BALLADS YOU CAN SING TO YOUR BELOVED "'How Do I Love Thee When You're Always Picking Your Nose?'" - Arnold, age 10
"'You Are My Darling Even Though You Also Know My Sister.'" - Larry, age 8
"'I Love Hamburgers, I Like You!'" - Eddie, age 6
"'I Am in Love with You Most of the Time, but Don't Bother Me When I'm with My Friends.'" - Bob, age 9
"'Hey, Baby, I Don't like Girls but I'm Willing to Forget You Are One!'" - Will, age 7
"'Honey, I Got Your Curly Hair and Your Nintendo on My Mind.'" - Sharon, age 9
WHAT MOST PEOPLE ARE THINKING WHEN THEY SAY "I LOVE YOU" "The person is thinking: Yeah, I really do love him. But I hope he showers at least once a day." - Michelle, age 9
"Some lovers might be real nervous, so they are glad that they finally got it out and said it and now they can go eat." - Dick, age 7
HOW WAS KISSING INVENTED? "I know one reason that kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and they didn't always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses." - Gina, age 8
HOW A PERSON LEARNS TO KISS "You can have a big rehearsal with your Barbie and Ken dolls." - Julia, age 7
"You learn it right on the spot when the gooshy feelings get the best of you." - Brian, age 7
"It might help to watch soap operas all day." - Carin, age 9
WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE? "When they're rich." - Pam, age 7
"It's never okay to kiss a boy. They always slobber all over you ... That's why I stopped doing it." - Tammy, age 10
"If it's your mother, you can kiss her any time. But if it's a new person, you have to ask permission." - Roger, age 6
"I look at kissing like this: Kissing is fine if you like it, but it's a free country and nobody should be forced to do it." - Bart, age 9
HOW TO MAKE LOVE ENDURE "Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work." - Dick, age 7
"Don't forget your wife's name ... That will mess up the love." - Erin, age 8
"Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash." - Dave, age 8
"Don't say you love somebody and then change your mind ... Love isn't like picking what movie you want to watch." - Natalie, age 9
wrenched out from douGH at 8:38 pm
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